Posted on June 23, 2016 under Faces in the Crowd with no comments yet

 

“You always have to have hope. I do try to see the best in everyone and everything.”

Meet Betty Webber.

Betty was born in Antigonish County to a farming family that grew to include ten children. So it was not surprising that she was raised by her grandparents starting at the age of 2, which was commonplace back then. Her father died when she was only eleven and one of her older brothers became the bread winner. She attended school in Cape George until grade ten. It was a school that was predominantly Catholic and, as a member of the United Church, Betty enjoyed some unexpected perks. “During Lent, when the Catholic students were trotted off to do the Stations of the Cross, we non-Catholics got to go home early.”

These days, fruitcakes are made weeks and sometimes months before Christmas. Back then the delicious Christmas treat was prepared two days before the big day. This coincided with the sale of a cow so that the family could go to town and purchase sugar, flour and fruit, which were not everyday staples.

She fondly remembers the dances, especially the ones at Malignant Cove when she would dance the night away to the strains of the Royal Swingsters. One time, during Highland Games, she got to see the legendary Don Messer perform at Crystal Cliffs.

She met her future husband and the love of her life, Ralph Webber, at a hockey game. Ralph had impeccable taste and proposed to Betty on their second date a few weeks later.

When their son Andrew was around 8 months of age, he fell ill. The Webbers drove from Aspen to Dartmouth to stay with Ralph’s parents. When their child fell unconscious, they made a dash for the Children’s Hospital in Halifax. This was days before the opening of the Angus L. MacDonald bridge in 1955. Realizing the gravity of the situation, bridge workers allowed them to cross. Part way across, Betty looked in horror as her son’s skin had a greenish yellow hue. “Ralph, he’s dying.” Only then did they look up to see the lamp poles adorning the bridge with their eerie colours streaking into the rear seat of the car.

Her life as the wife of a United Church Minister was extremely busy, as she was expected to be the social convener for many church functions. Oh yes, she had six children under foot as well!  “I was so busy but looking back, I wouldn’t change a thing,” she says.

She tells the story of one Christmas when they were posted in St. John’s, Newfoundland. An odd looking Christmas present arrived in the mail. It was a red bag with a picture of Santa’s face on either side. Santa had his eyes covered on one side and open on the other. For two years, Betty toted this bag around St. John’s as her shopping bag. At a Christmas gathering some time later, she went in to use the neighbor’s washroom. And wouldn’t you know it, there was Santa looking at her. Her “shopping bag” (the exact replica), was in fact a toilet seat cover!

She is a student of politics and one could say that Betty has been “liberal minded” most of her life. She confesses that she has voted for just about everyone except the Rhinoceros Party.

She attributes her longevity to “choosing the right parents.” She has always been active physically and mentally and is one of the many bedrocks of St. James United Church in Antigonish. “I love the United Church. It’s constantly evolving and it is a church that is willing to try new things.”

Betty’s glass is always half full. Her church, and the community at large, is blessed to have this dynamo in their midst.

 

 

 

Posted on June 20, 2016 under Monday Morning Musings with 3 comments

 

Balance.

This picture reminds me of the notion of the “wheel of life.” Each of the spokes represents a different part of our lives. These could include ( feel free to add you own ), the spiritual, financial, emotional, physical, recreational, social, psychological, mental aspects that most of us strive to balance. It is incredibly difficult and is an ever evolving process. More often than not, one or more of these things is going sideways. However , if you ever reach the stage ( normally later in life! ), when these things are somewhat harmonious, be extremely grateful.

I have been reluctant to put this out there but several people have asked me, so I’m coming clean. As we all know, the world has become very small and travel to all corners of the globe has become commonplace. Sometimes an opportunity presents itself at just the right time in your life when there is some semblance of the aforementioned balance!

I have been offered a chance to volunteer with an organization in India that works to promote gender equality and to help people overcome poverty . Part of my duties will be chronicling the lives of their people and writing about some of the projects that the organization is involved with. While I’m there, I hope to travel to other parts of India and make a side trip to Nepal and possibly Vietnam. I will continue to post  “Faces in the Crowd” on Thursday and I expect to have some very compelling stories.

And speaking of “Faces in the Crowd,” this week’s subject is a well known and much loved woman who has served her family, her church and her community with distinction for a long time. She is the epitome of positivity and is a bundle of energy.

I have several other FITC pieces in the works. Our community is oozing with interesting characters.

Have a wonderful week.

 

Posted on June 16, 2016 under Faces in the Crowd with one comment

Lidet, Grace, Maeve, Abaynesh, Jeff, Mohammed, Meg

 

“I would like to say that we met in a church but I really met my future husband in a seedy bar.”

Meet The O’Connors.

Meg McQuade was born and raised in Lowell, Massachusetts, one of eight children. Jeff O`Connor was raised in Billerica, just a short jaunt down the highway from Meg’s home. He has four other siblings. Meg`s house was a busy spot. Like many large families, their adage was “The more the merrier.” And they were a verbose lot. Talking louder and faster than a sibling was the norm in order to be heard.

Meg’s grandfather had relatives in Caledonia Mills, Nova Scotia, so when a friend from her school mentioned St. F. X as a possible place attend university, the family decided to make a road trip to check it out. The intimacy of the small campus in Antigonish got Meg’s attention and she graduated from X in 1993. Asked what she remembers most about her university days, she says, “Travelling to Cape Breton, friendships that endure to this day and of course, Wheel pizza.”

One evening, back in Massachusetts, she ended up at a bar with some friends. It wasn’t the classiest joint by all indications. She was sipping on water when a fight broke out. There was another guy at the bar and he too was drinking water. After chatting awhile, Meg went home and announced to her mother that she had just met the man she was going to marry.

They dated for a few years and got married in 1996. She completed a law degree and they bought a house – a “fixer upper”. Jeff was just the guy to turn their garage into an office for Meg, as he was an accomplished carpenter.

As a court appointed special advocate, Meg came in contact with many foster families. When she and Jeff talked about starting a family, the notion of adoption was not ruled out. They attended an information session on International adoption the week before Maeve was born. Her older sister, Grace had arrived two years earlier.

Before Maeve turned one, the family doubled in size with the arrival of sisters Lidet and Abaynesh from Ethiopia. Next came Fekadu, Eyob and finally, Mohammed. In the blink of an eye, the O’Connors were a family of nine.

There were a myriad of challenges besides the realities of having a big household, including health issues and being a multi-racial family. Meg decided that the clan needed a full time mother, so she put her legal career on hold. This, of course, resulted in financial pressures but they quickly found out what things were absolutely necessary and what things were frivolous. Needs and wants were quickly compartmentalized.

Meg and Jeff have no illusions that the road ahead will be easy. But having two people with inordinate amounts of compassion gives them a strong foundation. By her own admission, Meg is the “ideas person”.  But she is quick to point out the importance of team work. “We could never have done this without Jeff. He is a quiet guy but works like a dog. He is totally dedicated to his family. He’s the real deal.”

And what does this couple do in their spare time (!)? They are quite involved in a non-profit group whose mission is to support Ethiopian grassroots organizations as they build their own strong communities. They have linked with the Coady International Institute in Antigonish, who have provided them with a network of people who run organizations in Ethiopia. When they put on a fundraiser, it is not uncommon to see the entire O’Connor family with their sleeves rolled up.

 For the O’Connors, life is a family affair.

 

Eyob and Fekadu