Posted on April 8, 2021 under Thursday Tidbits with 2 comments

Weir Beach

 

“I want to run wild and live life to the fullest… but I also want to be in bed by 9:00 p.m.”

L.P. A friend of a friend.

A few days ago, while vacationing in Victoria, I received a dinner invitation. When I was asked what time would suit me best, I cheekily suggested 4:00 p.m. I was joking, of course… sort of. You see, with the three- hour time difference between B.C. and Quebec, we would actually be dining at 7:00 p.m. I know that is warped logic but when you’re travelling through time zones, you’re always making these kinds of calculations.

As I mentioned in an earlier post, I had a helluva time this year adjusting to the time change. I thought it might be attributed to living in the north but the more likely conclusion is that damn aging thing again. Everything seems just a bit more challenging when you’ve been stomping around the planet for nearly 70 years. So, it came as no surprise to me that flying west last week, kicked the crap out of me with the time zone change.

The first night, I managed to stay awake until 8:00 p.m Victoria time (11:00 p.m. Kangiqsujuaq time). I had been on the go for 18 hours that day. At precisely 2:30 a.m. I woke out of a dead sleep. Yup. My inner clock said “rise and shine”. I normally get up at 5:30 in the morning. Mercifully, I was able to get two more hours of sleep.

In the best of times, finding a 24- hour diner serving breakfast can be a bit tricky. During a global pandemic, I would have a better chance of finding the Oak Island gold treasure chest. With no cooking facilities in my B&B, my options were limited. The night before, I had dined with Peter at a restaurant, crawling distance from my accommodations.  I had a spicy rice bowl chicken thingy, and the serving size was befitting of a lumberjack. My B&B does have a small bar fridge and a coffee maker (two of the essentials) so I was able to doggy bag the considerable amount of leftovers and put them in the fridge.

Do you know what it’s like eating cold spicy rice bowl chicken thingy at 4:30 a.m. washed down with a steaming cup of Folger’s coffee? It was fantastic of course because beggars can’t be choosers and I have seen enough poverty in my travels to realize that my breakfast fare would be a meal fit for a king in certain parts of the world.

Speaking of lumberjacks, I received a message on my Week45 site the other day which led to an interesting exchange of e-mails. It’s not that I have a staggering number of readers that I don’t know but once in a while, I’ll see a comment and have no idea who’s messaging me. I try and respond to all my messages even though I often don’t receive them in the north with the questionable (?!) internet service.

It so happens that this gentleman is married to someone that I worked with about 150 years ago. He has a keen sense of humour. This line in his message broke me up: “I believe we have, according to J., (his wife) a great deal in common other than just rugged good looks, ripped abs, devastating charm and rapier wit.”

Now, I could probably write an entire page refuting all of this. I might be able to make the case that I have a certain degree of wit (and width these days) but as for rugged good looks, ripped abs, and devastating charm? Sorry, my friend. I’m delusional but only to a degree.

I’m happy to report that I have slowly adapted to the time change… just in time to fly back north and go through it all again.

Have a great weekend.

P.S. On a serious note, my neighbours back home in Antigonish, Shane and Stacey, suffered a devastating fire and lost everything. They and their two children are going to need a lot of help. Please consider sending a donation to this GoFund account and keep your eyes out for a fundraiser being organized by my daughter, Betsy at Piper’s Pub. https://www.gofundme.com/f/lost-home-and-all-belongings-in-fire. I’ll match your donations up to $250. If you don’t like GoFund me, e-transfer the money to me and I will see that Shane and Stacy receive it. Thanks a lot. (lenpdmacdonald@gmail.com)

Shane and Stacey have been good neighbours. They have a trampoline in their back yard. All three of my granddaughters have spent countless hours there.

 

 

Posted on April 5, 2021 under Monday Morning Musings with no comments yet

The crown jewel of Victoria. Hint. It’s not me!

 

“Lord, I was born a ramblin’man,

Tryin to make a livin’ and doin the best I can,

And when it’s time for leavin’ I hope you’ll understand,

That I was born a ramblin’ man.

Ramblin’ Man – Allman Brothers

I wasn’t going to mention this for fear of losing the few remaining friends that I have left. This will unquestionably raise a few eyebrows and elicit some sneers of derision. But one of the joys of being a senior is that, with advanced age, you start to care less of what people think about you. The only person that really worries me is the undertaker.

It is Spring Break at our school. I have been in the north for eight months without a break. Remember, the only way in and out of my village is by plane. I could not go home for Christmas because it would have been sheer folly to spend my entire Christmas holidays in quarantine only to return to the north and do two more weeks of the same. While I thoroughly enjoyed “Christmas in Kangiqsujuaq”, I have been feeling the need to get away.

I decided to travel out west to visit my son, Peter.

“You did what, you silly ass? Aren’t you aware that there is a third wave of the pandemic going on in Canada and around the world? Haven’t you heard every health official tell people to stay home and avoid all but essential travel? With every passing day, more provinces are going back into some form of lockdown.”

Ok. My internet has been working well lately. I know about all these things and the Raptors long losing streak. Get out the violins. I don’t know if mental fatigue  rates as essential travel but that’s what I’m going with. I have consulted a few doctors and nurses that I respect. I wasn’t looking for their blessing, but I did want to know if I was being careless and selfish. I had the Moderna vaccine four weeks ago and according to the most recent data, it appears the efficacy rate is north of 90%. What I have learned from these doctors and nurses (and reading respected medical journals) is that my chances of contracting Covid are slim and my chances of passing along Covid to someone else are also small.

A few days ago, the Centre for Disease Control (CDC) in the United States issued an updated travel statement. Here is the nub of the advisory: “Domestic travel is low risk for fully vaccinated people.” I can see you shaking your head. “Len, that is the United States and you are not fully vaccinated.” Once again, deferring to medical experts, the second dose only increases the efficacy rate by a couple of percentage points. The CDC goes on to say that “certain types of travel are absolutely going to be more essential. And that’s not just for work: we sometimes need to travel for our mental health to spend time with people we haven’t seen in a year.”

Honestly, as I sit here in the airport in Montreal typing this, I think that there is a better chance of dying from loneliness than Covid. My entire check in took under 5 minutes including security. I was the only person in line at security. Didn’t need my Nexus card!

Airports are surreal places these days. One is struck by the quietness. People are keeping their distance, of course and wearing masks. Couple this with the fact that every person is on some kind of electronic device and the atmosphere is less cheerful than a wake.

I have been following rigid Covid protocols for a year like all of you law abiding citizens, maybe doubly so because I am teaching where mask wearing is as common as chalk dust. Travelling from the north was the safest part of the trip as there are no cases of Covid and the entire Nunavik region is a green zone.

Traveling from Montreal to the west coast, I decided to add an extra layer of protection by wearing an N95 mask. I pity the health professionals who have to wear these every day. They are quite rigid and not terribly comfortable.

The flights were barely a third full and everyone was wearing masks. Ditto for hotels. As much as I would like to stay with Pete in his yurt, I chose to rent an Air B&B in downtown Victoria. Pete and I plan to hike every day. I don’t plan to go and visit any of my old friends in Victoria in their homes. We will safely distance in their back yards or go for walks. I have brought along an old CCM (Victoriaville, Hespler – I’m dating myself) hockey stick which we will use for our walks. Someone will hold the blade and the other the butt end of the stick. I’m joking of course, but you get the picture. I am going to be exceedingly cautious.

I hope everyone had a relaxing Easter weekend.

Have a great week.

P.S. OMG. I’m getting old. On my flight to Vancouver, the flight crew dimmed the lights and transformed all of the windows using tinted glass. It felt like you were flying at night. I thought that this was particularly weird. Oh yes, on the 5- hour flight, we generously received a bag of pretzels that wouldn’t fill the stomach of a mature vole and an equally midget sized bottle of water. Our “gift bag” also included a mask, hand sanitizer and wipes. How charming.

In the old days, the button to activate the overhead light was on the arm of your seat. Wanting to read, I fumbled around trying to find the gd light. A flight attendant came by and showed me the light button on the screen in front of me. Later, I wanted to watch a movie (Dead Poet’s Society with Robin Williams). I plugged in my ear buds. The movie began but there was no sound. Once again, I found myself flailing around trying to figure out the sound system. Have you ever tried lip reading Robin Williams? As I scarfed down my wonderful meal of 6 pretzels, I realized that I would once again have to reach out to the overburdened staff. Honestly, the flight crew have nothing to do on these long-haul trips other than maybe changing toilet paper rolls in the bathrooms.

A flight attendant was walking down the aisle. Just before she arrived at my seat, I discovered that ear buds work particularly well when they are placed in your ears. I had skillfully placed one end into the screen console but had forgotten to put the buds in my ear. Thank god I figured this out before she got to my seat. Being ejected from the aircraft over Lethbridge would have been insulting and embarrassing.

The movie was excellent. When I arrived in Vancouver, I was understandably peckish. As I was standing in the lineup at Tim Horton’s, I felt an itch in my right ear. When I went to scratch it, I realized that the end of one of my buds had remained in my ear.

Do you ever think that you’re “losing it”?!

 

 

 

 

 

Posted on April 1, 2021 under Thursday Tidbits with 3 comments

Sailing off into the sunset

 

It was bound to happen. It was just a matter of time.

After 10 years and 1205 posts, the time has come to put Week45 to bed for good. Simply put, I have run out of gas. Have I finally run out of story ideas? Not really although I must admit that there have been many days when I had to scramble to get something ready for the 6:00 a.m. post. Let’s face it, the world would not have stopped or even noticed if I had taken the odd day off, but I always felt a sense of loyalty to my readers.

This grand experiment happened totally by accident. Paraphrasing Yogi Berra, I came to a fork in the road ten years ago and took it! On a trip to Florida, I wrote my very first piece on the flight from Toronto to Tampa. The rest, as they say, is history. A few people seemed to like my quirky sense of humour and before too long, I was writing for three newspapers. I’m not sure where the idea of writing a book came from but I decided to delve into the murky world of publishing. Originally (and quite naively) I thought I might be able to make a few bucks off this venture. Call it beginners’ luck but my first book sold over 1,000 copies. None of my other 5 books have reached such lofty heights.

Writing opened doors for me to travel. Undoubtedly, I would never have travelled to such far flung places as India and the Arctic were it not for my writing. The best part of the writing, however, has been this incredible connection with so many of you, some of whom I’ve never even met. It has been one long and interesting conversation.

So why am I hanging up my pen? There is a none too subtle pressure to produce stories every Monday and Thursday. It’s always in the back of my mind. As soon as my Monday Morning Musings has been posted, I immediately start wondering what I’m going to write about for my Thursday Tidbits.

In short, I am mentally fatigued and it’s time to take a break. A long, extended break.

I want to thank all of you for your remarkable loyalty… and stamina. Putting up with this nonsense for all these years should be considered purgatory on earth. You should all receive the Order of Canada.

Salut. Stay safe.

Have a great weekend.

P.S. It’s April Fool’s Day and I’m quite certain that I had a few of you going. Nah, I’m not going anywhere. You will continue to receive my mindless drivel for the foreseeable future.

P.P.S. On the weekend, I met up with four lovely, young women while out for my walk. When we finished, I invited them in for fresh coconut cream pie and apple crisp…. and tea… Red Rose. I’m not sure how we got on the topic of cremation but as we did, one of the girls let out an audible gasp. “Oh my God, I lost grandma.” She was staring down at the ring on her finger. She explained that when her grandmother died, she took some of her ashes and mixed it with a gel or cement and had it embedded in the ring. On our walk that day, granny disappeared. The ring was still firmly ensconced on her finger, but her grandmother was nowhere to be found.

Her reaction was somewhat odd. We all figured that the loss of something so precious would be devastating but she was quite sanguine and unperturbed. She felt that it was somewhat fitting that some of granny’s mortal remains would rest eternally on the lands of our founding people. What came out of her lips next was priceless. “I guess it’s better to lose granny on the tundra than behind a cushion on the couch mixed in with potato chips, cracker crumbs, and dust.”

Dust to dust. Ashes to ashes.