Monday Morning Musings

Posted on April 6, 2020 under Monday Morning Musings with one comment

It is with great sadness that I announce the sudden and tragic death of a beloved member of the family. The death occurred at home last Friday, April 3rd. She served me so well for more than 10 years when I first laid eyes on her. She greeted me with a smile every day and perked me up when I was feeling down. Even on my worst days, she was there, loyal and dependable. She provided unconditional love and never let me down.

My day came to a grinding halt.

Let it be known that on Friday, April 3rd, 2020, my Bunn coffee maker gave up the ghost. (or the roast)

Desertion.

In most countries this would be grounds for divorce.

It’s a bit of a grind being without coffee during a period of self-isolation. I wasn’t sure whether to call the 811 number to report withdrawal symptoms or to call 911 and bring in the big guns because of a legitimate emergency.

One of the perks of self-isolation is that you can drink as many cups of coffee as you want. If you have to make 10 trips a day to the bathroom, no one will know or care. Can’t sleep at night from a caffeine overload? As a friend said to me the other day, “There is no real time in isolation. Do whatever the f… you want to do whenever you want to do it.” If you’re clinging to the ceiling at 2:00 in the morning, it matters not. You can go back to bed at 10:00 a.m.

After momentarily paying my respects, I got on to the serious task of finding an immediate replacement. I called my friend Bill who did some trouble shooting over the phone, but he quickly ascertained that nothing could be done to resuscitate the machine.

I really don’t need a sophisticated coffee maker any more that can make coffee on demand for ten people. As I continue to shed friends, mostly through attrition, a single cup cone apparatus will suffice. By late afternoon, a cone and some number 2 filters were dropped off at my stoop.

Without the kindness of family, I wondered how I might have handled this emergency? I reckoned that I could possibly have lasted 24 hours without a coffee, but not a minute more. I pictured myself putting on my winter wear and heading outdoors, breaking all the rules of self-isolation and risking scorn and the possibility of a fine. But desperate times call for desperate measures. I would have to find a 24-hour drive through restaurant to quell my caffeine craving. Yes, I know that some coffee chains won’t allow a person to walk through a drive through but I’m sure once they saw the look in my eyes, they would waive protocol and hand over a large senior’s black cup of java.

However, long before I could make it to the restaurant, there is a good chance that I might encounter a member of the RCMP or a by-law enforcement officer. I’m quite certain that they would recognize my plight and drive to the coffee shop at top speed with lights blazing and sirens blaring.

There will be a spring burial when the grounds are softer.

All unfiltered comments about this post are welcome.

As I walked the machine and carafe to our outdoor garbage boxes, someone whistled and said “Nice Bunns.”

Have a great week.

P.S. I DID NOT walk to the dumpster!

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