Thursday Tidbits

Posted on August 26, 2021 under Thursday Tidbits with one comment

 

 

A Covid love story

 

And now for something totally silly.

Covid has been such an odd time for all of us. Our lives have been disrupted in so many ways. Many of us have had to quarantine, sometimes more than once. Families have been forced to stay apart. People have had to wear masks and social distance. We have had to use so much hand sanitizer that our skin is nearly raw. We haven’t been able to attend weddings, funerals or birthdays. Many have had to work from home and some people, like musicians, haven’t been able to work at all.

Against this backdrop, it is hard to believe that a new romance could flourish but this is precisely the case with Victor and Nikki. Sort of. It had all the markings of a soap opera. Every bit of this story is true. Well, most of it is true.

There will be thousands of books written about Covid. Most of them will be scientific in nature but surely someone will chronicle love lost and found amid the rubble of the pandemic. One can only surmise that the pandemic was a bonanza for dating sites. These may have provided one of the only opportunities for people to meet.

Victor and Nikki bucked this trend and decided to meet the old-fashioned way – on a blind date. Wearing masks and staying six feet apart brings a whole new meaning to safe sex.

Victor lived in Glen Air Estates. Glen Air Estates is a trailer park outside of my hometown.

Mutual friends arranged for Victor to meet Nikki. Fully masked they got together for a first date. Victor, being a prince of a guy and one showing good taste, thought that a trip to a roadside power centre was a great way to get things started. What could possibly go wrong with such a romantic gesture? Love was in the air. So was the smell of gas as Victor pumped while Nikki preened, straightening her hair and adjusting her mask in the truck’s mirror.

The power centre also housed a casino. What better way to get to know someone than by sitting at $1.00 slot machines amongst the din common in gaming houses. If sweet nothings were being uttered by Victor, Nikki wasn’t able to hear them. It wasn’t that they fell on deaf ears. It was simply too noisy and Nikki couldn’t lip read with a fully masked Victor.

Mercifully, the visit was short lived.

They could have gone next door for Mary Brown’s chicken for a bite (deep fried chicken -surely the way to a girl’s heart) but Victor had other plans. He was a classy guy.

What came next was a bit of a shock to Nikki. “Would you like to go to mother’s?” She had known Victor for all of two hours and already he was anxious for Nikki to meet the family. In light of Covid, Nikki wondered about the prudence of going into a stranger’s house.

They drove back to Victor’s trailer. He parked the truck and beckoned his new love interest to walk with him. Nikki’s first instincts were that Victor’s mom also lived in the same park. Her second instinct was to run away as fast as she could. Victor had the temerity to ask her to hold his hand. Nikki had the good sense to rebuke this unwanted advance. They exited the park and started walking down the highway. Nikki kept her hands in her jean’s pockets.

Not far from Glen Air is a truly legendary restaurant called Mother Webb’s. It has been a popular eatery for many decades. Mother’s, as it is affectionately called, is known for its steaks and quick, courteous service.

Nikki, being the preceptive sort, quickly put two and two together and realized that they weren’t going to Victor’s mom’s place at all. When they arrived at the restaurant, Victor announced that it was his birthday.

One other thing that Mother Webb’s is famous for is their offer of a free meal on a person’s birthday. Victor was no fool but he certainly was a cheapskate. They sat down and he ordered “Mother’s Best”. Nikki ordered the Junior Rancher with fries and coleslaw. The one exception around masking is dining. It is very difficult, nigh impossible, to eat a steak while fully masked. The evening was already turning into a disaster as Victor’s entire script to this point was about muscle cars. As I said earlier, what could possibly go wrong. Nikki tried not to gasp when she looked at Victor’s full face for the very first time only to discover that he didn’t have a chin.

Nikki wasn’t able to finish her steak. She had lost her appetite watching Victor extract meat from his teeth with a piece of paper torn from the placemat. Ever the gallant, Victor came to the recue and polished off the final morsels on Nikki’s plate.

When the bill arrived Nikki also discovered that Victor didn’t have his wallet with him. All along he had planned to let equality rule the day and thought that each person at the table should pay their own bill. Of course, his bill was zero. Just like him. Nikki paid for her dinner and they left for the short walk back to the Estates.

Dear reader, you may be surprised that this was the only time that Nikki dated the Fresh Prince of Glen Air.